Until recently, I have never loved anyone. From my earlier post about “Love v. Attachment,” I realized that all the “love” I experienced in my life was only attachment. I loved them because I needed them to fulfill my needs. This love was dependency because I needed something in return from the other for my love. Love is unconditional and requires nothing in return.
The first step to overcoming attachment is to understand the difference between need or dependency and love. Once we acknowledge that difference, then every time we have an interaction with those we love, we ask ourselves, am I doing this out of need? Am I asking another to meet my needs? Do I want something in return for this love? If the answer is yes to any of these questions, then it is dependency that we have for another, not love.
I experienced true love for the first time recently. There is someone in my life from whom I felt terrible pain and hurt because of my own hurts and fractures. Over the course of the last year, we hurt each other often with each interaction. However, I recently began to forgive him and myself for each of these hurts from our interactions. For the first time, I felt what it is to truly love someone. It is unconditional without asking for anything in return. It is the compassion to understand and accept their humanness, hurts, and shortcomings. It is to forgive them for their trespasses against us, and this forgiveness is continuous on a daily basis. It is to give them kindness and comfort even when they hurt us. This is true love.
I feel such gratitude to be shown this love and to be able to give this love to another. I feel ever closer to my Higher or Divine self when I give this true love to others. This love is awe inspiring.
May you find your true love within. ~ Brooke (Copyright 2012 Kundalini Spirit)